Wednesday, September 6, 2017

Ironi

Hidup penuh dengan ironi.

Contoh nya di sepanjang aku posting di O+G, hampir setiap hari aku akan jerit kepada patient yang sedang bertarung nyawa untuk bersalin,

"puan! Teran puan! Push kuat kuat. Semangat sikit!."

Then mostly patient akan reply,

"tak boleh doktor. Saya tak larat dah.. Tak boleh doktor"

Restlessly saying while the baby head is already at the perinuem.

"puan! Tak boleh macam ni. Puan kena kuat semangat. Puan boleh!! "

And the echoes unconsciously floating in my head.

Ironi nya, hari hari aku balik hostel yang kusam tu dengan perasaan sebagai seorang loser.  Hari hari aku rasa nak berhenti kerja. Hari hari aku rasa aku tak layak kerja yang so called murni ni.

Hari hari aku rasa.......

Life.

Sad things does happen.
Yes it do.

Like when the whole day you work hard, (you think you were)
But, without any mercy
You were labelled as useless.

Your sharp tongue does kill my heart.
Fly me back to the bitter days

Where i cried after fail to deflate Foley's catheter balloon for cbd during first year ospe

Or

The day i dissapoint myself after failed intubation during osce 4th year

Or

The day i felt sorry for myself after failed to answer fammed 5th year osce question

Thank you for bringing me for a short bitter vacay dude

Friday, August 11, 2017

Work hard till you die. Im dying. But didn't think that i deserve to die now. Should work harder.

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Sincerity

Im in my way learning and understanding the meaning of sincerity.

Monday, June 12, 2017

There is time..
Where you were sorry for everything that had being said and done.

Dear my sayang,
Im sorry for not being able to give a good care for you.

Dear family, especially mami and abah,
Im sorry for not being able to spend more days with you.

Dear self,
Im sorry for being sorry again.